16 Clever Jokes You Probably Won’t Get

Found on the Internet, March 5, 2015
Posted here April 28, 2022

  1. Who is this Rorschach guy? And why does he paint so many pictures of my parents fighting?
  2. A Roman walks into a bar and asks for a Martinus. The bartender asks, “You mean a martini?” The Roman replies, “If I wanted a double, I would have asked for it!”
  3. René Descartes walks into a bar. The bartender asks if he wants anything. He says, “I think not,” then disappears.
  4. An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar. The first orders a beer, the second orders half a beer, the third orders a quarter of a beer, and so on. After the seventh order, the bartender pours two beers and says, “You fellas ought to know your limits.”
  5. Yo momma’s so classless she could be a Marxist utopia.
  6. Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero? He’s 0K now.
  7. Sixteen sodium atoms walk into a bar followed by Batman.
  8. Pavlov is sitting at a bar when all of the sudden the phone rings. Pavlov gasps and says, “Oh crap, I forgot to feed the dog.”
  9. Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and, with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
  10. What’s the difference between an etymologist and an entomologist? An etymologist knows the difference.
  11. There are two types of people in this world. Those who can extrapolate from incomplete data.
  12. What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?
  13. A photon checks into a hotel and the bellhop asks him if he has any luggage. The photon replies, “No, I’m traveling light.”
  14. Yo momma is so mean she has no standard deviation.
  15. I’m thinking about selling my theremin. I haven’t touched it in years.
  16. An MIT linguistics professor was lecturing his class the other day. “In English,” he said, “a double negative forms a positive. However, in some languages, such as Russian, a double negative remains a negative… but there isn’t a single language, not one, in which a double positive can express a negative.” A voice from the back of the room piped up, “Yeah, right.”